there’s been something bothering me

The whole obsession of having to go out and get uncontrollably drunk, stotter around in stupid shoes, get groped by creepy men and attempt to dance in an over-crowded, over-heated dark room.

Through my first year of uni I can count the number of times I went out to do this on one hand, whereas the majority of students were doing it every night and STILL managing to make it to at least some of their lectures that week…

I personally don’t see why it’s so enjoyable. Don’t get me wrong, I love a drink and some fun with my friends – but there’s something about queuing outside in the freezing cold, paying stupid amounts of money to go into a sticky, smelly, stupidly loud room and queue for half an hour at a time just to get a drink that really doesn’t appeal to me. This has caused many problems between myself and my friends as there’s constantly a pressure to fit in at uni – and going out drinking is really the only way you’re going to be able to do it.

Unless I’m completely 100% in the mood for it the night often ends in disastrous consequences (cue me exhausted, grumpy and with sore feet wanting nothing else than to go home and sleep). And when I say grumpy, I mean there is nothing I can do to get back into the spirit of things. I ruin my night, and everyone who I’m with and I absolutely hate it. I don’t know why it happens and it’s lead to me staying in on so many nights because I just don’t want to be the party pooper.

My poor boyfriend has to deal with it and has to end up leaving early, when I know he really wants to stay given he rarely gets the chance to go out due to his hectic timetable.

I just don’t understand the appeal of spending hours on your hair and make-up, to go and get completely off your face, drenched in sweat and covered in other people’s booze just to have a good time. I feel like I’m a total let-down of a student if I can’t even enjoy a night out. I don’t have the kind of attitude where I can be happy eating baked beans on mouldy toast because I’ve spent all my money on booze. I hate waking up tired and nauseous the next day, having to drag my sorry ass into a 9am lecture (which will probably be a waste of time anyway)…I’m the kind of person who enjoys eating dinner and then curling up with a good film in bed, having a cuddle and falling asleep for at least eight hours, waking up, still having money in my purse and being alive enough to actually do something productive with my day.

Whatever happened to house parties?! Where it’s quite acceptable to sit in your pyjamas, get drunk and play twister – then pass out on the floor/sofa/bath when it suits you…

It’s times like these when I can’t wait to be an adult and have an excuse for not going out…

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